About

September has been a really tight month and I barely caught myself a breather. Thank God for sustaining me. Thank God for His unfailing mercy and grace upon me. Last weekend marked another record as I spent 12 hours at church, being given the privilege to serve along with the Youth Band in the morning and afternoon church anniversary celebration service where realistically speaking I am no longer a youth anymore :P

Just a few thoughts that I gathered along the past few weeks that I didn't manage to pen them down.

About Change

We always initiate Change for a better. Change of lifestyle, change of habit, change of sleeping pattern, change of new gadgets ... We always Restructure for the better. Restructure of administrative system, restructure of human resources in a company, restructure of departments ... The question is, will change and restructure always result in something better? Recently the cell groups in my university decided to birth forth a new cell group after much prayers. Different ones were approached and taken to form the new group. Some were reluctant at first but they acknowledged the importance and purpose so they availed themselves. At the same time, some leaders or key players of each group left for respective reasons. As the leadership team shrunk, new coordinators were given the batons to take charge and lead. The split was meant for radical multiplication, but many groups have since then, growing smaller and smaller. Culture within the group (the one that I attend) has gradually changed, it is different right now. New visitors came but most of them did not stay long. Some didn't want to commit, on and off. Some came to know Christ but sad to say, haven't been seeing some for a season of time. I wished they would have stayed, perhaps there are issues to deal with or perhaps, the follow-up system ought to be polished. I once thought, didn't it seem to be better and stronger before and not after the split? After all, I believe in the God-given authority within the leadership team. The season has not been performing well, the split caused some to lose heart, but it's all for a good cause. I will just walk along and witness. I do what I can and to serve, though I don't have a say to change or impart something right now, I pray I can ignite something great to boost the gloom through the student movement next year on campus. That's my greatest resolution.

About Influence

Everyone has his/her own influence, in his/her unique way. Some are good at motivating and encouraging people, some's presence within a group setting can stir a big woo-wow, some are just natural born leaders where people will just willingly follow ... It has been a long season, if it is negative I will say a season of frustration and asking God WHY. But I am taking it positively, I might be restrained, refrained, kept in the shell but thus far I have opted to use the space and time I have to meet and greet as many people as I can, trying my best to be a living testimony. I slip into many groups with the intention to know a wide array of people and to find the little hole which I can bless, impart, encourage, and ultimately to point them closer and closer to Christ the chief cornerstone. My prayer is that they do not need to remember me or what I have done, but Christ. I am bold enough to say I love every group, I love my neighbour, I just want to extend what I can do and offer to beyond my house. I hope people understand that. After all, I want to be a Godly influence. I was told I might not be given the position, but I can disciple people as I go. Recognition doesn't matter.

About Lukewarm

Sometime I just couldn't figure out how people can choose to snuggle underneath their warm blanket, stay in their comfort zone and be pathetic. What does it mean to Deny oneself, Take up the Cross and Follow Christ? How much have we endured? Just a smooth ever sailing life? NO WAY! The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Only if all can contribute and strive for the Kingdom, I can't imagine the magnitude of power we can generate as Christ Ambassadors. So, don't just taste the grace and do nothing. Buckle up and do something! If not, be reminded that God can easily deny us when we reach the heaven's door.

God All Sufficient

I shared this prayer to my lifegroup members during pre-lifegroup meeting yesterday. It blessed my heart richly, hope to my readers too. Ponder at the message the author trying to deliver.

O Lord of Grace,

The world is before me this day,

and I am weak and fearful,

but I look to thee for strength;

If I venture forth alone I stumble and fall,

but on the Beloved's arms I am firm as the eternal hills;

If left to the treachery of my heart

I shall shame thy Name,

but if enlightened, guided, upheld by thy Spirit,

I shall bring thee glory.

Be thou my arm to support,

my strength to stand,

my light to see,

my feet to run,

my shield to protect,

my sword to repel,

my sun to warm.

To enrich me will not diminish thy fullness;

All thy lovingkindess is in thy Son,

I bring him to thee in the arms of faith,

I urge his saving Name as the One who died for me.

I plead his blood to pay my debts of wrong.

Accept his worthiness for my unworthiness,

his sinlessness for my transgressions,

his purity for my uncleanness,

his sincerity for my guile,

his truth for my deceits,

his meekness for my pride,

his constancy for my backslidings,

his love for my enmity,

his fullness for my emptiness,

his faithfulness for my treachery,

his obedience for my lawlessness,

his glory for my shame,

his devotedness for my waywardness,

his holy life for my unchaste ways,

his righteousness for my dead works,

his death for my life.

~ The Valley of Vision

When life seems to fall apart, remember God's providence, grace, mercy and love. Remember the rainbow - sign of God's promise. Every cloud has a silver lining. Nothing is too big for God to handle. Be still and look to thee, the mountain where we shall stand unshaken. Above all, remember God's sovereignty and supremacy. He is God the able.

Do We Believe?

Little thought of the day.

In life, there are moments when we can't understand how things happen and it is even harder to fathom why things happen.

It is always easier said than done, especially when we get down to comfort someone. For example, victim of certain tragedy. We can give and quote all the biblical references and word of encouragement but little do we actually know how much that actually helps. But, what more can we do? Apart from prayer, physical assistance...

We know that God is all we have and God is able for he holds all things together. But, it requires faith to see that. In the past there are non believers who actually told me that Christian quotes are not about relationship with the Creator, but mental boost and mere encouragement in times of need. We gotta see beyond that. First come the relationship and through the journey that we embark and partner with God, we know that God he goes before us and he is with us. It takes second for God to perform a miracle. But the question, do we believe God is able?

I wonder what's the reaction of the disciples when their master was bullied, tortured and then crucified on the Cross. They witnessed everything. How did they take it? What about Jesus? He went through and bore the entire sickening process. How did he feel? How did he take it?

There is difference between a bystander and a victim. There is difference between an onlooker and a participant.

Do we believe everything happens for a purpose? Do we believe everything happens according to the will of God? Do we believe it is not just an accident? Do we believe?

Who Moved?

Deuteronomy 31:6 says "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." That's the just-in-time encouragement Moses gave to Joshua, the man who succeeded Moses to lead the Israelite into the promise land.

Subsequent verse 8 says "The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” Who can actually Go before us and at the same time Be with us? That's not something human can achieve. God is omnipresent. He is not confined to space. If God is confined and limited to space, he is not God as if God is all powerful, how can space overpower God?

God's promises will never fail for that is the character of God. When God promises something, he will definitely fulfill it. What we need to do - receive as it is.

Perfection can only be found in God.

God never moves. God is never too far away, for we are the one constantly moving. In many parts in the Bible, we can see who are the ones 'coming back to God'. For example, in the Parable of the Prodigal Son, the son was the one who returned home and sought his father's forgiveness. We are the one who need to run back into his embrace. We are the one who constantly need his grace and mercy. We are the one who always make mistakes.

God's fountain is 24 / 7. The one that will never run dry.

Action involved - Come. Simply come.

If one departed from God, who moved?

As Weak and Vulnerable

In my life journey with God, I encountered great amass of events and been through ups and downs. Many points in life I was so frustrated with myself when I found myself entangled by sins. Though I know that I am now a new creation in Christ and that Jesus has set me free and the power of Holy Spirit dwells in me, I can still fall into temptation and commit sin. It is due to the sinful nature that every being carries, and that no one is perfect except God. As I reflect and ponder, I come to the realization that no one is sinless except God. If one is forever purified and remains sinless after accepting Jesus into his or her life, then does the person still need God? The person will never need to go through repetitive repentance before God nor do grace and mercy mean much to him or her. Therefore, repentance is not an once-off process. We need to drink from God's grace and mercy and seek His forgiveness constantly. Subsequently, we find ourselves longing more of Him every single day and knowing that we are Nothing without Him. If not, why do we address God as the Precious One? Precious means highly esteemed, of great value and very costly. Think about this, if we can attain something easily without much pursue, how much will we treasure the thing?

It is in my weakness that His power and strength are made perfect in me. It is in my ugliness that I see His perfect being and beauty. Of that, I can't boast how mature and perfect I am, but to boast only in the name of Jesus.

On the other hand, there are times where I perceive that I am better than others, or that I am purer or more righteous than another person. This often happens when I tend to compare myself with one another and deem that another person has committed a Bigger sin than I. Recently, it caused a big woo-wow as a leader in the church committed sexual sin and was pregnant as a consequence. Upon knowing, I was not there to justify or condemn but it reminded me of how fallible and feeble every person can be, regardless whether one is a pastor, a deacon or a leader. Everyone is living by grace alone. Everyone needs the same portion. As it is written: "There is no one righteous, not even one. Romans 3:10. It is often when a church is undergoing trials and persecutions that people get united and stronger.

I borrowed one of the resolutions of Jonathan Edwards and made it mine as I relate myself to his position.

‎"Resolved, to act, in all respects, both speaking and doing, as if nobody had been so vile as I, and as if I had committed the same sins, or had the same infirmities or failings as others; and that I will let the knowledge of their failings promote nothing but shame in myself, and prove only an occasion of my confessing my own sins and misery to God."

I consider myself as worse as any other being, that nobody else can be so bad as I am. When I see the weakness and sins in another person, I am convinced as if I had committed the same sins and same failings. It brings shame to myself seeing another believer falling and that causes me to seek His face and confess my sins before Him constantly.

None is greater, none is more righteous, none is perfect, none doesn't need God. We are all on the same boat, needing Jesus to calm the storm.

Farewell

Being a student, I look forward to the long deserved semester break at the end of every semester. I love to do countdown and get excited over it, longing to sleep in as if day and night doesn't really matter anymore and to have my own time and space to do whatever I want at the speed which is convenient and comfortable. It is the greater allowance of freedom I am seeking after.

Holiday supposes to be joyful and breaking free. Despite that, ending a semester can mean graduation for other students. Though graduation should be a joyous moment as we celebrate those who have successfully fought the good fight over the lengthy 3 - 4 years of university life, it can be sad as another chapter of life - career is soon to be embraced, whether one likes it or not. Farewell has become one of the other option one often has especially for the international students. There are two options: To stay or return home.

It is never easy to leave all the experience, emotions and memories behind and just simply turn your back and leave a place for good. It is even harder if you have a great bunch of friends that you truly love and whom you have been journeying along for years, those who walked through ups and downs with you. Most people will at least have the inner urge to truly treasure their last few months, weeks or days prior to their departure. They will arrange appointments, meet-ups, and do all the things they have yet accomplished or tried so that they will not be leaving in regret. Quality time and waking up early will now be a thing to ensure their days are well spent. Some might even wish for the time to pause for awhile.

On the other hand, the people surrounding those soon-to-fly-birds will now have a fairly packed schedule to meet. Farewell parties, catch-ups, hang-outs... just to make sure good time is invested with those who are leaving, intensified by the fact of not knowing the next time of seeing each other. Both parties are affected. Both parties are reluctant.

However, it might not mean so much if the chapter here is a nightmare and if one couldn't wait to break free from the pit.

There is always a place we long for, or someone we long to see. Farewell is not the end of something but the beginning of something new. For now, I have just farewelled my dear housemate and soon, there will be a few more to cry for.

So, are we boosted and motivated to leave a legacy and memorable footprints as we reach and leave a station in life?

All in all, trust in the Lord always. Knowing that He has a plan not to harm but to prosper us. We have a big God. Don't run our own agenda, but let God be the driver.

Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails. Proverbs 19:21

Be Right Back

Just as Jesus is returning soon, I will be back soon to blogging due to my super intense period of studying.

Thought of the Day:

What can separate us from the love of God?

Our love can fail, but God's love will never ever fail. He made all things for the good of you and me. Take that.